Warning: strong opinions ahead

Ha ha ha ha.
Maybe I'll feel differently if I have a kid someday and that kid goes to school, and his or her teachers go on strike but right now, the news that Philadelphia archdiocesan teachers voted to strike just fills me with giddy glee. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I started high school during the strike of 1997. Maybe it's because I started 12th grade during the strike of 2000. Maybe it's because I sent this email to my mom last week after initial news reports about the contract disputes:
The teachers' contracts are up for renewal AGAIN? Didn't that just happen? For the love of ....okay, I will pay the archdiocese $50,000 for the express purpose of giving the teachers whatever they want just so I don't have to hear about any more potential strikes. It's getting old. And yes, that $50k comes with strings attached:
1. It stays in my account and I will disburse the money once a year to a representative of the teachers' union-- a representative that I pick.
2. If I become incapacitated, my power of attorney will take over disbursing the money.
3. My power of attorney is my sister.
4. If Bevilacqua, Rigali, or that new guy (the one with the French name) are ever in the same room as that money, it goes right back into my "Obama for 2012" savings club. No ifs, ands, or buts.
5. Let's drop all the pretense about how Bevilacqua is too sick to testify or something. BOLLOCKS, I SAY. If he really were sick, every parish in the diocese would have been told to pray for him well before last Spring's abuse reports. I call "shenanigans." Haul him into court already. While we're at it,  maybe we should dig up Krol for questioning.
It's just...I don't plan to ever not be Catholic and the Philadelphia archdiocese is a large component of that identity but...the Philadelphia diocese is not making it easy right now to be a Catholic. The Church leaders here in Philly are just not getting this whole "don't abuse little kids, don't lie about it, don't KEEP lying about it, etc." concept. Like, that concept is East and the Church here is West-- on Neptune. Sigh.
Remember that episode of The Simpsons where Bart's accused of stealing the collection plate money and Homer freaks out at him?
Homer: Son, if you can look me in the eye and say you didn't take the collection money, that's all I need. 
Bart: [looking at him] I didn't take it. 
Homer: Why you little! -- [strangles him] How can you look me in the eye and lie like that?! 
Lately, I feel like Homer whenever Philadelphia archdiocese leaders (clergy and non-clergy alike) start talking.

(For the record, I do not have a personal dog in the fight that is the church sex abuse scandal. Despite being in numerous church-and-parish-school-related extracurricular activities like choir, altar server, etc., I was never targeted by a shady adult. Maybe Little Kid Me gave off invisible "don't mess with this kid or she'll make your life a living hell" vibes. Would that I could channel those vibes to the more annoying panhandlers now).